Um. Way to be self-sabotaging fandom! Hating people who are actively participating in fandom just because they're participating is not going to help anything. And what's up with the personal vendettas against BNFs? There's this really nifty feature called the scroll button when you don't want to read something.
Anyway, some people defend hate memes because they're like, the only opportunity for non-BNFs to be heard and anonymous commenting levels the playing field or something. Yes, it totally sucks that lj is more of a popularity contest than a cohesive community, but seriously, if you're yourself are actually involved in fandom, can you not see the good in encouraging everyone to participate? Because it seems to me that a lot of times creative people play off of each other and encouraging that should never, ever be a bad thing. One thing I do wish though, is that some of the stuff brought up in the hate threads could actually be discussed outside of the context of petty, spiteful commentary.
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I really try to leave feedback for everything I enjoyed reading, but if it's a writer who I know doesn't respond to feedback, I usually won't bother. Above and beyond any considerations of fandom etiquette and politeness, not responding to feedback (at least to me) seems to indicate a certain level of indifference towards even getting feedback at all.
And personally, I like writing feedback, I like picking out what I loved, and telling writers exactly what worked for me. So I usually spend a good amount of time trying to construct something more than a quick "thanks!" (not that there's anything wrong with doing that, sometimes it's all I have time for too.) Fandom is a reciprocal culture, if I don't feel like the time I put into feedback is appreciated, I won't leave it. And more than that, feedback is pretty much the best opportunity for readers to interact with writers, it's how a lot of meta gets discussed, and how a lot of people meet new friends. I don't think every writer has to automatically make friends with all of their reviewers, but I think it's nice when the channels of communication are at least open to that, even if all it is is a standard thank you reply, at least that's something.
Some of the best meta discussions I've had have come out of feedback threads,
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See, I can totally get behind that because you know why they're not responding to feedback. If I know why a particular author doesn't respond to feedback, I'm probably going to be a lot more interested in continuing to leave them feedback. Where it starts to irk me is when I see an author continue and continue to ignore feedback without any sort of response at all. That has always felt more like a closed door than anything else. Even worse (to me) is seeing an author pick and choose whose feedback they'll answer and noticing that it's only their friends that they reply to. I tend to think that feedback as a compliment rather than a thank you or a gift is a better fitting analogy, and I know I would never purposefully ignore a sincere compliment if I recieved one.
Yeah I know that feeling, and it's true that if a given writer never answers her feedback without explaining it, I'm less likely to give any, although if the fic really does blow me away, I might still give some.
. Even worse (to me) is seeing an author pick and choose whose feedback they'll answer and noticing that it's only their friends that they reply to.
That came up in the feedback thread on that hatememe--I actually participated in that particular thread posting as myself and it's too bad it vanished with the rest of the stupid meme--and it boggled me. I would never ever do anything that rude to people who took the time to reply to me. And yes if friends give me feedback, I might do the *hugs* thing or call then "hon" or bring up an injoke, but I'd never only reply to them.
From reading the saved threads on fandom wank, yeah those were threads I would have jumped on, too. Elitism (or percieved elitism) is never pretty, especially in fandoms where popularity is already a hugely divisive issue. If I were inclined to take fannish activities more personally than I do, I could definitely understand why some people were so bitter about authors like Pru who don't seem to respond to feedback unless it's from someone they already wanted to talk to. As it is though it doesn't piss me off to much as turn me off from wanting to give them more compliments in the future.