Um. Way to be self-sabotaging fandom! Hating people who are actively participating in fandom just because they're participating is not going to help anything. And what's up with the personal vendettas against BNFs? There's this really nifty feature called the scroll button when you don't want to read something.
Anyway, some people defend hate memes because they're like, the only opportunity for non-BNFs to be heard and anonymous commenting levels the playing field or something. Yes, it totally sucks that lj is more of a popularity contest than a cohesive community, but seriously, if you're yourself are actually involved in fandom, can you not see the good in encouraging everyone to participate? Because it seems to me that a lot of times creative people play off of each other and encouraging that should never, ever be a bad thing. One thing I do wish though, is that some of the stuff brought up in the hate threads could actually be discussed outside of the context of petty, spiteful commentary.
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I really try to leave feedback for everything I enjoyed reading, but if it's a writer who I know doesn't respond to feedback, I usually won't bother. Above and beyond any considerations of fandom etiquette and politeness, not responding to feedback (at least to me) seems to indicate a certain level of indifference towards even getting feedback at all.
And personally, I like writing feedback, I like picking out what I loved, and telling writers exactly what worked for me. So I usually spend a good amount of time trying to construct something more than a quick "thanks!" (not that there's anything wrong with doing that, sometimes it's all I have time for too.) Fandom is a reciprocal culture, if I don't feel like the time I put into feedback is appreciated, I won't leave it. And more than that, feedback is pretty much the best opportunity for readers to interact with writers, it's how a lot of meta gets discussed, and how a lot of people meet new friends. I don't think every writer has to automatically make friends with all of their reviewers, but I think it's nice when the channels of communication are at least open to that, even if all it is is a standard thank you reply, at least that's something.
Some of the best meta discussions I've had have come out of feedback threads,
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I much prefer author brainstorming for another story or delicious manipulation.
Entitlement of any sort is offputting to me, whether on the reader or writer ends of the scale. It seems like a lot of authors respond in kind to the feedback they get, with longer feedback leading to longer responses. I can't help but enjoy this, because it seems like it can definitely lead to een more discussion and sometimes new plot bunnies or tighter characterization and more creativity. I don't think any author has to respond to feedback, but it's always seemed the polite thing to do.
And a complete word to what you said about ljers picking and choosing who they respond to. It annoys me because if those are the only people they want to interact with, why don't they just set up filters and lock everything down to just those people? Why have an open journal if you're not actually interested in interacting with the people who read it?
*nods* Yeah, I'm not saying I'm immune to getting a reply from author, especially if it is more than a simple thank you.
Ensuing discussions are fun - and often reveal more of the story's and characters' background, etc -in some cases even additional plot, you know? I love those, pressing on thread links and learning more. But if it is not author's cup of tea I am not hold it against them, which seems to be the case with some.
What I am afraid of is that that hate memes only hurt people and as a result of that make them go away -- which is less fun for everyone who were enjoying the work of that author!